For years the saying has gone something like this: the home is the wife’s domain so men need their own room, often known as a man cave.

But as our nation undergoes a number of cultural and domestic upheavals, the logic of that proposition no longer holds water.

For starters, women constitute nearly half the U.S. workforce, meaning they are less and less likely to see the home as their domain the way their mothers did. Equally important, the percentage of men who are doing a family’s cooking, cleaning, and childcare has increased over the past several years.

We also noted in a previous post how women bore the brunt of the pandemic shutdown. They were more likely to work from home, help the kids with online schooling, prepare meals, clean, and still hold down a job. They were burned out, depressed, and hungry for an escape of their own.

 

What all this means is that the modern American home should no longer be seen as the sole domain of a woman and, similarly, it’s equally understandable that women might want a domestic sanctuary of their own. But instead of a cave, these new rooms or ADUs are called ‘She Sheds’ or ‘Lady Haven.’

Creating a Woman’s Space

In interviews with women, it’s clear that rather than being seen as an ‘escape’ the way a man might describe his man cave, separate dwellings for women are intended more as a reflection of a woman’s personality, her desire for self-care / nurturing, and an outlet for creative expression.

She Sheds – Often repurposed from an exterior shed or built new, the She Shed may be designed as a refuge with ambient lighting, soundproofing, built-in bookcases and / or entertainment systems, comfortable seating, wood-burning stove, and / or a large floor area for yoga and similar wellness exercises. Women who own She Sheds report using these dwellings to read, write, exercise, meditate, or practice a hobby.

“Mine would be an art studio, but would also have a love seat or something for sitting and reading. Maybe a mini fridge in there. Definitely a good sound system for music.” – Reddit Poster

Wellness Rooms – Usually indoor spaces redesigned to incorporate spa-like features, including steam showers, heated floors, meditation and yoga areas, natural materials (wood, stone, etc.) and soothing lighting systems.

Lady Haven (Aka Woman Cave) – A repurposed room or nook designed to meet a woman’s specific needs. These may be all or part of a basement, attic, spare room (especially as the nest starts to empty), or even large closets. Features may include spa features like those listed above), comfortable seating for get-togethers such as book clubs, yoga/mediation areas, natural materials, lots of natural lighting (and plants that feed off it), and crafts areas.

Building Your Own She Shed

So how do you go about creating your very own She Shed?

Find the Mood – For starters, ask yourself how you want to feel in this space? Are you looking for wellness practices like meditation and yoga; eager to do more hobby or craft work; or just looking for a quiet place to relax and read / listen to the music you like? Note these don’t have to be exclusive – you may want all of the above plus more.

“I’d probably make it my own private library with ceiling high bookshelves and a wine/whiskey bar. Ideally with big, comfy faux leather armchairs.” – Reddit Poster

Find the Space – Once you’ve detailed what you want, the next goal is to consider your existing living space (including outdoor areas) to determine where you might reinvent a room (or build an ADU) to accommodate those desires. If space is tight, don’t overlook alcoves or nooks that are most unused – we’ve built hidden rooms inside vacant wall space homeowners didn’t even know they had!

Personalize – Once you’ve got your area under development or done, it’s time to personalize it with art, furniture, colors, and materials that are ideal for your particular personality and desires.

The Extras – Lastly, don’t forget wellness, comfort, and entertainment accessories that, together, make your She Shed everything you wanted (sound system, elegant storage, vanity lights, soft rugs, etc.).